Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Living with Mets Bc part 3- End of Life Planning

Monday, August 22, 2016

End of life planning

Planning for end of Life.

Hello friends,
Life is rough.  And  it can often be hard to talk about the rough things with the people you are closest to in life.  If you have mets or love someone who does, this is the one of the most important conversations you will have Here's the thing, everyone is going to die.  All of us!  The thing is, we know that we  are going to die, and we also know what will most likely be the cause.  Talking about your exit from this world is something you should discuss with your partner at the moment you have determined you are committed to each other.  This conversation should happen between the topics of how many kids you want to have and whether or not you are a dog of a cat person.  You should know how you both feel about death.  
The first step should be to meet with an estate planner.  If you have already done this, you are waaaaay ahead of the plan.  If not, stick around, there is a lot more to cover.  So, as I was saying, schedule an appointment with an estate planner.  They will walk you through the process of  making financial plans, funeral/burial/or cremation plans.  They will help you choose a guardian for your kids, your pets or any elderly people under your care.  
End of life plans are as varied as people are. It is the details that make them unique.  Some people want an all out funeral, with a burial and a memorial service.  Others want a cremation with, and others may just donate their bodies to research.  All of these options are just fine.  But remember your loved ones will want to memorialize you in some way. You should decide in advance how you want to be remembered.  Do you want it to be religious, in a bar, at a park.  Do you want a  wake, or a memorial gathering?  You are probably hoping that you will pass away peacefully in your sleep taking everyone by surprise.  But if you have mets you know it is coming.  Best  to prepare.  
There are more things to decide than where you want to be once you are gone.  It is important to know how you want to spend those final days.  As you decline in health, do you want to be at home with visiting home health care?  I have seen both ends of the spectrum.  My father in law passed away at home with hospice.  My sister passed away in CCU.  I myself have decided  that dying at home is not how I want to leave this world.  I would prefer that I have 24 hour a day health care, and that my family not be put in the roll of care giver as they are saying their goodbyes.  It is also important to know and share with your partner how you feel about life saving measures.  If you do not want life saving measures be sure to have your estate planner draw up a do not resuscitate order.  Also make sure your partner or a close friend or family member has power of attorney.  You should make sure that both documents (dnr, and power of attorney) are on record with your oncologist and your hospital or care facility. 
Make sure that your family and friends know who is allowed to be with you at the end.  When my sister died, there were people present who I know my sister did not want to be there.  It made it difficult, as it made her last moments a sort of spectacle.  So, be very clear with everyone who you want with you.  Your care team will make sure that people are kept out who are the not on your list of approved visitors.  
Do you want an obituary?  If you do, do you want someone close to you to write it, the newspaper, or yourself.  You might want your own words used.  Or you may not want an announcement at all.  Just know what you want and be clear about it.  Put it in writing.  
Finally, If you have possessions that you want to go to a specific person, make sure that it is clearly stated in your will.  Perhaps you don't want to do that.  You may want to make sure that you make a gift/memory with the person you are leaving your possession to while you are still here.  Even if that is the case, make sure it is in your will that while you were still alive you gave such and such to so and so that it will not be disputed at a future time.  The purpose of a will is to smooth things as much as possible for you and for the people you leave behind.  In addition, if you have recipes or traditions you want to pass down, put them in writing and share them with all your loved ones while you are still alive to share them.  People who are close to you will cherish these for a life time, and these recipes and traditions will span generations.  
I am positive that there are points that I didn't cover, so do  me a favor and put any thing I missed in the comments below.  I love to hear from you!
Thanks for stopping by, 
Be looking for a video on this topic on Wednesday.
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Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Living your best life with metastatic breast cancer.

Hey friends,
I just wanted to share how you can live your life while having mets bc.  I really open up about the past 5 years and share how my experience with mets has been.  thank you for stopping by,
Give this video a thumbs up,

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

What to expect upon mets bc diagnosis

my body is becoming my enemy

Hello friends,

Hasn't this Summer gone so quickly?  It started out very busy and fun and lately has been just routine and regular.  I have fallen back into a routine of living from chemo to chemo and from one oncology appointment to the next.  At my most recent appointment a week ago, we discussed the possibility that my extremely bloated mid section could be caused by fluid build up in my abdominal cavity.  I will be going in for a ct scan on the 29th, but that is over 2 weeks away.  In the meanwhile, I am as I said, living from appointment to appointment.  Don't get me wrong, I have had fun in the in-between times.  We took time out for a trip to Tx to see our son.  It was a  quick visit, but I enjoyed every second of it.  I have taken a couple of trips downtown Chicago with my daughter, and have spent a lot of time just relaxing in the yard with the Mo bear.  The past few weeks I have walked Sadie's little paws ragged going out to play pokemon go with her and the rest of the family.  You are never too old to play you know.  
I would like to say I have living with cancer down pat, but things are always changing.  I feel the fluid in my lungs increasing.  It makes it harder and harder to breathe.  I have the aforementioned possible fluid  in my abdomen, or perhaps I have just become obese.  My level of pain and discomfort has been steadily increasing and I no longer feel comfortable within my own body.  It is as if it has waged war on me.  One thing I can state is this.  It can destroy my body, but it will never take my soul or change my mind and heart!  Part of taking back control of my body is asking for a referral to speak with a counselor at my next oncology appointment.  I am also going to check in to what I need to do to have Sadie become an emotional support dog.  My anxiety is becoming an issue again, despite medication for it, and I feel myself giving in to panic attacks.  She is laser targeted in to that anxiety and will start licking me as if to calm me down.  Such an amazing little soul Sadie has.  
So folks, be looking for my latest video in a few hours, and I will see you next week when I upload part two, "living with metastatic breast cancer".
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Wednesday, August 3, 2016

August update/ possible paracentisis in my future.

Thursday, July 28, 2016

July update- 3 part series coming your way